Guest writer

---After a year of procrastinating, my friend Puma has finally put his thoughts on paper. The post below is his take/reaction/thoughts on my previous post (THAT time of year)---

You know I agree with what SATYA says about this whole 26/11 (twenty Six Eleven) NAME Calling and how its become some sort of a sordid reminder of what happened...I should know cuz I once forgot my wive's b`day. The doc who treated me said the scars run much deeper now.

Humans as a species don’t like to remember the unfortunate things in life. I for one have a very happy life cuz I have a very bad memory. Enemies are now my best friends and ex lovers are well still ex (they just won’t pick up my calls, don’t know what’s up with that)

Though I feel that at the end of the day it’ll just be a date and nothing else... this country has wayyy too many people in here to worry bout. It’s that "GUY IN FRONT OF ME RATHER THAN I" kinda thinking.

I saw that entire blood bath on TV too but like Satya I didn’t mix it with pakodas and tea. I remember ordering Chinese from a guy on a hand cart, completely fucked my stomach, had the worst diarrhea ever and that’s another reason I won’t forget that fateful day. But leaving my bullshit aside I think it takes a lot to willingly enter a building full of people who’re ready to die as against YOU who wants to LIVE.

If it takes people to see it on live TV, EVEN BETTER. People are immune to reading about death/rape/carnage/molestation in BLACK AND WHITE every morning with their eggs and toast. This is going to sound a lot worse than I mean BUT THINGS LIKE THIS SHOULD BE TELEACST LIVE ALWAYS. Show a rapist being chewed by rabids and I guarantee you’ll see a drop in the act, telecast a murderer swinging from the gallows and you’ll just have to be “SERIAL KILLER CRAZY” to pick up a knife.

We are a DEMOCRACY and a country willing to fight to save a life no matter how many more we add to it every sec. We should make these atrocities even more visible EVEN if it takes you spilling your dinner out from the wrong end. We’ll continue to fight or write about them and people will take a bullet for you and me CUZ THIS ISNT FKIN SOMALIA YET OR PAKISTAN (which is one and the same)

I know I can’t take a bullet for someone but I did get into lots of fights for lots of people and got the shit kicked outta me too. In no way am I comparing myself to any of the heroes that day or the people who got killed were similar to me taking a beating... its just that in the twisted reasoning of terrorism and killings this date like so many of our personal misfortunes will get embedded far deeper than the shallow scars of bullet marks and shattered glass.

THAT time of year

It is THAT time of the year again. Yea, THAT time. We do not experience it often, but India has 2 days a year where our patriotism reaches the zenith, we constantly say “fuck Pakistan ya” and Jayanti Natrajan yells louder than Pavarotti in concert. The days in question are of course 26th January and 15th August. These being public holidays also help.

But this year we have a new and improved day to get emotional, sensitive and patriotic. Its called 26/11. It’s this day last year when 10 young men from the lost world of Atlantis breached our water tight security and slaughtered more than 170 people in our country’s financial capital. The reason generations will cherish 26/11 more than the other 2 days is for the simple reason that we saw it live on TV with chai, pakodas and the Rakhi Sawant of news- Barkha Dutt as accompaniments. Also, the scale of operation was huge and most importantly the people killed were rich and important. Candle manufacturings were having a ball with all the power cuts but with candle light vigils to mark this day…oh what a fun. We were all shocked at the way things unfolded and are still waiting for the movie to release so we can “truly” understand what happened. I personally hope 26/11 becomes what the 4th of July weekend is to the USA—i.e the first weekend of July is a 3-day weekend.

So what has changed 1 year down the line?
1) Maharashtra has re-elected the same government ruling at the time of 26/11
2) The people of India have re-elected the same government at the national level ruling at the time of 26/11
3) MNS the “outsider” hater disappeared while outsiders were killing innocent people in Mumbai but won 13 seats in the next elections
4) Kasab is safe, has put on weight and has been treated for all his ailments by Mumbai based doctors at the cost of Rs. 31 Crores (TOI)
5) Clusterfucked Pakistan still can’t make up their mind and come out of the closet
6) India still feels that if you ignore your problems long enough they will go away.

To all those who perished and to those who were left behind after 26/11- sorry about what happened. Like they say….Karma is a bitch. That’s the best I can offer. No one will help you. Help yourself.

Last post on 26/11

Life

Back after a break of sorts.

Life:
Observations, lies and conversations

I want my woman to be independent:
I want my woman to earn at least 30% lesser than what I do and be moderately successful. She also has to quit working after we have a kid.

Am taking a sabbatical:
I quit my job and am in the process of finding another one. In the meantime pls pls pls don't judge me.

I want to become the CMO/Brand Manager/ Large peice of dung in the next 10 yrs:
I know for the longest time that I am a laid back guy but the people around me tell me otherwise. So I reciprocate saying, I am ambitious.

Trying to quit man. I will, I promise:
Shut the fuck up. Just because you quit you act holier than thou. Recollect those days when you rummaged through the ashtray for leftovers when you ran out of cigarettes.

Boyfriend: I have never watched porn:
He is lying.

Girlfriend: I have never felt this way about any one before:
She is lying.

I love Hockey:
Dyanchand is still playing isn't he?

I hate that biach Rakhi Sawant:
I love her. She is the reason reality television exists in India. Love them curves too.

The Effiel Tower looks stunning at night:
Been to Europe. Have you?

People with kids----other humans DO NOT find your kids as cute as you do. Your instinct makes you blind to the fact that your kids can be perceived as runts
and things others want to hit. "Beta, go to uncle" is something you should refrain from".

I am 30 and cannot make new friends.

Last week I wore a suit to this dinner and was asked to skip the security check and wished 3 times. All others without suits were being frisked. Well I don't
quite blame them cause most of the assholes who cause trouble when frisked wear suits.