Vote me, vote me a lot

It election time baby. This drama in real life beats the ones published by Readers Digest hands down. Some Daffy ducks and silly wabbits you cannot miss:



1. Sanjay Dutt: a.k.a the abomination. How far the seed had fallen from the tree. After BJP took onboard the "Shotgun" Sinha, SP not to be undone took on Sanju AK-47 Baba. After all, he is one of the few people who can say with conviction " been there, done that"

Speaking of the Samajwadi Party....their have promised us la-la land by planning to abolish Computers and English. The feel both these are deterrents to the country. Read here..

2. Celebrity MPs- here is a list of celebrity MPs and their dismal attendance record.

3. Then we have a mud slinging and statements that bring about extreme WTFness:

a. Priyanka Gandhi saying: "Rahul is PM material, says sister Priyanka". Why are PGs statements heard, printed, repeated and analyses when she isn't into mainstream politics? But guess her last name is Gandhi so its all ok. To come to think of it, Rahul baba is also a Gandhi, so shut it.

b. Rabri Devi's saala remark: "Who is Lallan Singh? He is Nitish Kumar's saala. Everyone knows this. I say this openly. This is why Nitish Kumar holds Lallan Singh's hand all the time whether they are in a meeting or a rally"

Take a bow to a women who had trouble constructing a sentence at her first press conference. You have come a long way baby.

c. Varun Gandhi: the puffed up mamma's boy. He is being hailed as BJPs Frankenstein after his "hate" speech.

d. Rahul baba's priceless pearls of wisdom:
" I should not feel ashamed of the poverty in this country. Congress believes in the future of every Indian" TOI, Hyderabad, 11th April, 2009

The fact that the Congress has been sodomizing us for the past 60 odd years, its no surprise that now- no one minds and no one cares. I think all the Gandhi cousins played "doctor" as kids. They seemed to have carved out each other cerebrums.

e. Now that Salman Khan isn't running over slum dwellers, he is asking them to vote for the Congress. Salman will take those who do vote for the Congress for a joy ride in his car for a meal of blackbuck biriyani.


f. ‘I don’t like Sonia’s face & voice’ Raking up the issue of Sonia Gandhi’s ‘foreign’ origin, a senior leader of Bihar’s ruling JD(U) said he disliked “her face, voice and language” and termed her popularity and acceptance as a national leader “unfortunate for the country”. Link

Sonia's reaction to this:


I could go on but you know the rest.

On a serious note, after Jaagore have come across another initiative. Its called Let's Vote. More details here.

Pureit to Fuckit in 60 seconds

Product: Hindustan Unilever (HU), Pureit - water purifier
Scene: The Pureit team meeting at a fancy ballroom in a 5-Star hotel where biscuits are called cookies
The Conversation:
Stooge 1: What should be that one emotion evoked in our customers after experiencing our product and service?
Stooge 2: Wow?
Stooge 3: I love Pureit?
Stooge 1: Na. Too cheesy
Stooge 4: "Fuck it"
Stooge 1: Interesting. Please elaborate
Stooge 4: Well, first of all it rhymes. Pureit and Fuckit. People who dare to become our customers should at the end of the day have a feeling of such helplessness with our product, service and the entire experience that all they feel should be captured in these 2 tiny words -"Fuckit"
Stooge 1: All agree? Great. So be it.

And that is how Pureit was born. The bastard child of Hindustan Unilever. I thought Airtel, Reliance etc were shit,that they had attained the holy piss-pot of god awful customer relations,that no-one, anywhere, ever, could be more disinterested, less helpful or more obstructive to delivering service to their customers, until I met Pureit.

I made the mistake of buying Pureit and come service time, it was an experience more painful than a man with 6 fingers giving you a full hand prostate exam. I spent 8 days calling the "no help" Pureit helpline, being lied to on a daily basis on how important I was and that my work would be done by that very evening. WRONG.

My search for the Pureit all India service head met with as much success as the US has with catching Osama. The "top" management are spooks. Ghost riders if you may. They are impossible to trace. Fortunately Linkedin came to my rescue. I wrote to random people at HU and asked them for help. The guided me to the right person in Mumbai, who I wrote to. By that evening the Hyderabad Pureit guys would have blown me if I told them to. The Mumbai gentleman was of great help but the damage had been done.

Verdict: Stay away from Pureit like the plague. Other that non-existent service I don't think it provides reverse osmosis which is essential for drinking water.

Here are a few more Pureit reviews.