Pureit to Fuckit in 60 seconds

Product: Hindustan Unilever (HU), Pureit - water purifier
Scene: The Pureit team meeting at a fancy ballroom in a 5-Star hotel where biscuits are called cookies
The Conversation:
Stooge 1: What should be that one emotion evoked in our customers after experiencing our product and service?
Stooge 2: Wow?
Stooge 3: I love Pureit?
Stooge 1: Na. Too cheesy
Stooge 4: "Fuck it"
Stooge 1: Interesting. Please elaborate
Stooge 4: Well, first of all it rhymes. Pureit and Fuckit. People who dare to become our customers should at the end of the day have a feeling of such helplessness with our product, service and the entire experience that all they feel should be captured in these 2 tiny words -"Fuckit"
Stooge 1: All agree? Great. So be it.

And that is how Pureit was born. The bastard child of Hindustan Unilever. I thought Airtel, Reliance etc were shit,that they had attained the holy piss-pot of god awful customer relations,that no-one, anywhere, ever, could be more disinterested, less helpful or more obstructive to delivering service to their customers, until I met Pureit.

I made the mistake of buying Pureit and come service time, it was an experience more painful than a man with 6 fingers giving you a full hand prostate exam. I spent 8 days calling the "no help" Pureit helpline, being lied to on a daily basis on how important I was and that my work would be done by that very evening. WRONG.

My search for the Pureit all India service head met with as much success as the US has with catching Osama. The "top" management are spooks. Ghost riders if you may. They are impossible to trace. Fortunately Linkedin came to my rescue. I wrote to random people at HU and asked them for help. The guided me to the right person in Mumbai, who I wrote to. By that evening the Hyderabad Pureit guys would have blown me if I told them to. The Mumbai gentleman was of great help but the damage had been done.

Verdict: Stay away from Pureit like the plague. Other that non-existent service I don't think it provides reverse osmosis which is essential for drinking water.

Here are a few more Pureit reviews.