Friday, June 5, 2009

The anal probe called iPhone

I know this post is real late, cliche and already written a thousand times...so fuck you too.

The "i" in the iPhone actually stands for IDIOT. Let me explain what an idiot means using a scale. This is so, all iPhone using idiots can understand who they are.

Intelligence Quotient (IQ) Scale:
70-100 - Americans
50-69 - George W Bush Jr.
30-49 - Moron
less than 30 - IDIOT

Here is a pictorial representation of what an IDIOT is.


courtesy: urban dictionary

I am sick of these i-phones using wankers sticking their fingers up each others asses cause the Sith Lord Steve Jobs told them to. Steve Jobs should actually be called Hand Jobs cause that's what he is handing out to the customer, along with TONS if bullshit. On a positive note...Steve Jobs is dying.....slowly.
All these i-phone using idiots are so high on the "feel good", "revolutionary" technology that they take the buzz outta weed and feel Bambi may visit them any second.


The iPhone in India is currently available in 2 varieties - 8 and 16 GB.
Nokia rules. It let's me do everything an iPhone does not and a lot more. Let's compare a few features of my Nokia E63 with a 16 GB i-phone.


I pay 1/3rd the price for a better product. I got the same camera as the iPhone does and making a call is so much simpler. I am no designer or expert in this field. But I will tell you what I am an expert at----identifying bullshit, and I could smell Apple's shit a light year away.

"My shit dont stink"
- Steve Jobs, Apple
WRONG

7 comments:

Vaish said...

Steve Jobs just met his match! Why don't you 'influence' people the way he has, make them buy nokia phones instead. I think that picture you threw in would be way more appropriate for you :P

as_him said...

Your post explains why Steve never makes products for India. Indians are bitten by the 'featuritis' disease. Value for money is the mantra.

Steve Jobs understands people better than anyone in the tech industry. Apple had guts to get into and impact the industry which Nokia was part of for more than 30 years! Nokia, with all their research couldn't think of a phone with no buttons for 30 years!.. hmm.

Technically speaking, Nokia entering the smartphone market gives all the signs that it is shitting bricks- because of Apple. Not every phone with a big screen can become an iPhone killer. Because its the OS inside that matters- and Apple has the best mobile OS.

BTW, have you ever used the iPhone yet? I have. The internet browsing experience is unparalleled to any other smartphone that I have used- Blackberry, HTC, Nokia..

Sneha said...

whatever makes you feel better.

Satyajit said...

Vaish:

Whatever :-)

Ashim:

Spoken like a true designer under the influence of the Sith Lord.

Part of my angry is against Steve for trying to sell me something that doesn't do nothing extra for me and ask me to pay 3 times the cost.

Think your value for money point is what it all stems from. For a superior interaction experience an Indian or any sensible human wont pay 3 times the cost and be ok with the fact that there are no basic features.

The point of Nokia missing the train on touch screen interfaces still does not negate the fact that the iPhone is a piece of shit.

BTW, have used a Blackberry and the iPhone for browsing (not extensively)and it does not light my fire.

Satyajit said...

Sneha:

Yes. Spewing venom makes me feel better. Also calling a spade a spade makes me sweat less....

as_him said...

Well, I do not own any Apple product. So don't think I am under influence. But I do admire great design when I see one.

A lot of people in India buy phones for features which they don't use after some time. As old Reliance ads say "Phone hota hai baat karne ke liye"

Jon said...

Oh dear.. do people actually spend time on the internet arguing over phones?